In the beginning before God created House music..

Lets get pedalling…

Story goes like this.

In the beginning, before God created house music, a hairy dude in a cave carved a wheel.

Not much happened with that wheel, apart fae the odd cart or chariot with blade and/or spike protrusions.  Nothing to get too excited about. Unless you were getting chased that is.

So lets take a Vincenzo Nibali style sticky bottle   and accelerate through  a few millennias. Stopping off at the bottom 1800s Germany in a Bavarian BeirKeller for some well earned hydration .  Time travelling is exhausting you know! But what’s this before oor very eyes. A dude rolling along on two wheels? It cani be? Is that Marty Mcfly? Naw It’s that kaiser, Baron Karl (with a K) Von Drais on a his ‘Dandy horse’. Yes, you read correct.  The ‘Dandy horse’ or Laufmaschine as it was more parochially known.

In essence this was a running machine, akin to the rather ‘Dandy’ balance bikes that oor wee toddlers use tae burn off their rather excessive consumption of deep fried Mars Bars and cans of Irn Bru. (Aw bless their wee ginger Barnet’s).  Stereotyping to the side. It was the dogs danglies of the day, with the added benefit of having alot less shit tae deal with than  a horse.

Now a few metaphorical beers and a hundred years tae the wind. Best we head away from Bavaria and’ Laufmaschines’ and get back on the road, to good old blighty. Right Into the thick of WW2, where genius Alan Turing (of the AI test) and his cohorts were inventing one of the first modern day computers.  (That’s when they weren’t cracking German codes in WW2 that is.  Idle hands in awe that.)

 
So now we’ve got the invention of the wheel, the first bike and the birth of modern day computers.  Where am I going with this? Sometimes I don’t even know, but let’s keep motoring like Cancellara’s bike on this ride through time.

Aye computers were good but they wurnae a great invention ( mountains without roads).  Basically massive pocket calculators until they could exchange/transfer the information held on them.

Yi cani whack a good bit academia to make bold steps for mankind and thats what four universities did in the 80’s.  Creating the first wide area network, so they could exchange information from computer to computer.   Lets call it the internet for arguments sake. Arguably, one of the greatest, yet newest inventions ever .  Could you imagine life without internet now?  Or maybe you could and that’s why you get out on your bike to escape it?

 That technological road over that mountain has now been laid and It doesn’t take long for the computer revolution to take its Grand Depart (tae Yorkshire)  .

Next thing personal computers are flying into homes faster than TUE applications to the UCI  before Le Tour. Satellites are fizzing out into space, like Bidons to the kerb after a feed stop.

Getting tired yet?  Hang in, we are deep into the stage and now face a kicking steep climb into the 2000s.  Fear not, we  have our road captain Steve Jobs to pace us up.  But first, I’ll send him back to the League of Innovators Team Car for gels and water to prepare for the final push to the pinnacle of this story. But, awe naw …snaw! He returns absent of gels and water (Lazy hippy mutha $£@$%). Instead he produces the  gateway drug into a life of tech slavery from his black turtle necked jersey. Aye,  the worlds first smartphone( and a chorus of Oohs and aahhs ripple around the world).  WTF Mr apple Snapple!

I wanted a caffeine gel not a third hand! But since your here, let me see it, so I can peruse pictures of friends holding up pints of lager at Airports!!

The APP industry explodes with activity and invention. Just like the peloton did when Movistar hit the front on the run into Blockhaus right after Team Sky get wiped out by a Police bike during Giro 2017 Sneaky little f*****s. But it doesn’t stick and there is a breakaway.

Two yahoos on a sabbatical from Yahoo, see a chance to take advantage of this Machiavellian Movistar attack and jump off the front of the pack. The gap grows and they decide they would like a time check with the rest of the peloton.   They stop, brainstorm, take a think shower and whatever else silicone valley, start up, blue sky chat they do.  They come up with the idea for a group platform messaging service called  ‘What’s App’ ( Intended to sound like the Budweiser frog advert. Remember ‘Whass uppp’?)

With ‘Whats App’ all of a sudden team’s everywhere find it so much easier to co-ordinate movements, regroup and discuss tactics.

 In fact, getting a Whats App going is easy as A-B-C or 1-2-3 & 4

Early adopters i.e our little merry band of drunks, muso’s and miscreants, just so happened to be getting into cycling and quickly embraced this nifty little invention for its simplicity in delivering ‘team coms’.  Through this galvanising medium, arranging adhoc rides became easy peasy lemon squeazy (Hey, great, no need to meet up down the pub noo to make plans.  Wait a minute? where did all the pubs go?) NOTE to self: Huge advances in technology, doesn’t always bring solutions and salvation.

In truth, It was a bit slow to start with. First Call to action:

“Hey who wants to come out for a ride the morra morning at 8. Not too far 20 miles or so?”

Response 1: “f%$k off, it’s 2am and I’m still in the pub”

Response 2: “ Wife’s working and I’ve got to watch the kids, watching the telly”

Response 3 “ Who the f&%k are you?”

Awrite, so a little problematic initially, but soon we were grasping it like jelly beans at a feed stop.   Now?  Our ‘whats app’ cup spilleth over.  There’s chat and alot of.  Mostly bikes, wine, life, music, art, wine, races, wine, bikes, cheese, music and there’s also a little bit of wine chat…you catch my drift. ( we still occasionally arrange rides).

So there you have it. The time line of The Braes City Rouleurs.  All the way from carving a wheel, to creating an app, to riding bikes.

Thats where we stand now.  This move into website territory wasn’t part of the game plan. For starters there never was a game plan. Just kindred spirits who liked bikes and the great outdoors. This just happens to be the next frontier or evolutionary techno-step.  “One giant leap for The BCR, one small step for mankind.”

• Long form adventure stories .( Ride to the Sun, The Tour of The Highlands and Ventoux)
• A Weekly ‘Rolling with’ blog. A collection of tastes,  sounds and rides that a BCR rider has indulged in that week.  P.S. Expect eclectic and wildly differentiating tastes
• We will also be taking submissions from guest Authors.
• We will be showcasing and celebrating local musicians and artists that tickle our fancy.
• We will also be specially curating for you; our fellow Rouleurs. Products that we know would be the ‘ danglies’ in  your Cycling wardrobe, Bike set up and/or  general lifestyle.

 

Daz

The BCR